His dick will tell you what feels good.
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For this reason, you cannot stay on his dick the whole time. As things start to go into our throat, most people have a gag reflex that makes us close up our throat. These are people who truly, unabashedly love sucking dick. A nice person will add his saliva and contribute to the store of spit you have at your disposal — either by spitting in your mouth or spitting on his dick — but these appreciated moves are not guaranteed.
Obviously you cannot hold your breath for a nonstop inhale.
My name is Alexander Cheves, and I am known by friends in the kink and leather community as Beastly. Hungry for more? A good blow job is as much about getting what you want as it is for him. Draw it out. Hard objects like teeth hurt easily.
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Stroke the base of his dick while licking and sucking the tip. Start by touching him. The skin of the penis is very thin and delicate and extremely sensitive. Photo by Jon Dean.
Look at his dick first before you dive. Try simply playing with his dick for a bit with a hand job. Sorry, sixty-nine fans. Maximize it. Talking becomes irrelevant and clumsy — animal sounds, groans and roars, take over. You want it. Instead, I focus on my own pleasure, my own mouth, and how this feels for me. One talking exception is when he wants to be dominant — see All sex is for your pleasure — even submissive sex in which someone takes over.
Keep talking to a minimum.
The size of his dick and the size of your mouth will determine how much you can do — a larger dick will make you less able to maneuver your tongue around it. The views in this slideshow do not reflect those of The Advocate and are based solely off of my own experiences.
2. don't hide in the corner
So relish in the experience of it, and only go for as long as you want. Touch him everywhere except his intimate areas. I love playing with balls. Those who are sensitive to frank discussions about sex are invited to click elsewhere, but consider this: If you are outraged by content that address sex openly and honestly, I invite you to examine this outrage and ask yourself whether it should instead be directed at those who oppress us by policing our sexuality. Make a show of pulling his dick out. This gives you a chance to build up some saliva and breathe a little bit before starting again.
These are tips and pointers that anyone of any gender can appreciate — 24 tips for giving amazing head. Deep-throating — sliding a cock past the larynx into the throat — should not be seen as the maximum ideal of oral sex or a goal you must move toward.
24 tips for giving amazing head
The same is true for oral sex. I tell everyone to maximize foreplay. Massage his dick through his pants for a little bit — gently so as not to cause any discomfort. Go slow. Rub it on your face, lick or suck his balls one of my favorite things to dochange positions, or let him take over.
It is an old truth that the best head-givers are ones who move on a mission. Start gentle and practice breathing with his dick inside your mouth. I generally always start by kissing the tip of the penis — the head — then moving down to the underside with the tip of my tongue. You are offering an intimate part of your body — your mouth, your breath, your voice.
For all others, enjoy the slideshow.
Licking his head, shaft, balls, and taint — the space of skin between his hole and testicles — can be just as intense. Letting go and letting my body and my mouth simply explore him will create better sex. Drawing out those early touches, those first stray hands, builds excitement and anticipation and confidence. The heat from your mouth and your breath will make him throb with anticipation — practically begging you to slide it in your mouth.
Most everywhere men have insecurities about their penises — especially since we live in a world that fetishes and glorifies big ones, bigger than most men have. Not everyone can deep-throat, and not everyone should.
This can be the most intimate part of sex. Practice sucking in air.
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I love rubbing shoulders, rubbing legs, easing his body into mine, and helping him relax — all well before my hands move to his crotch area. And practice.
Like everything I write, the intent of this piece is to break down the stigmas surrounding the sex lives of gay men. Study it. Not true. Good sex is about doing what feels good for you, and for some people that means surrendering control. I love kissing and touching.
Crushing on someone?
The frenulum is the underside of the penis head, which for many men is the most sensitive part of the penis. This helps me get an idea of its size and texture and smell — the hottest part for me — and gives me time to build up some saliva. The rest of us regular people have to learn, and the only way to learn is to practice. His pleasure starts with me — I have to be having a good time in order for him to have a good time. A classic trick. Also, most guys over a certain age struggle to stay very hard, and must of us take a while getting there.
Pain is often a of injury or skin trauma. Flick it back and forth, up and down, slowly creeping your lips up over his head, then backing off.
Most are filled with some kind of topical anesthetic that numbs the skin at the back of the throat for a few minutes, allowing you to deep-throat. Trusting my own sensation may mean that I at some point stop sucking and migrate to a rim job, or I may want to focus on his balls for a while. This is your chance to intimately enjoy his dick. Your mouth will dry out. As it moves to the back of your mouth, try to keep breathing normally. Various bodily conditions render some unable to.
It will lead me through every step. In your mouth, you can feel every vein, texture, throb — all of it.
Many people see oral sex this way — as a cursory, prescribed action that generates an equal return, usually some kind of penetration. And feel free to leave your own suggestions of sex and dating topics in the comments. Take frequent breaks. I am a sex-positive writer and blogger. Kiss it. On your knees! Expert head queens are to be revered. In my experience, the longer I draw out the preamble, the less pressure I feel to perform in the moment. This is how we choke. The focus is pleasure — yours — and not the specific sex act. Practice breathing while his dick is in your mouth and slowly get comfortable doing so.
Doing this pulls your cheeks against your teeth and tightens the space inside your mouth, creating a kind of vacuum suction that feels really great.